SARAH ELSWICK (IDEALLY 50s)

Owner and operator of Beach Haven Rest Home. Sarah is kind, generous and deeply devoted to the women in her care. Although occasionally naïve, she has considerable inner strength and will fight fiercely to protect the home and the people she loves. A major role requiring warmth, emotional range and strong comic timing.

JONATHAN LEONARD (IDEALLY 50s)

An officious and deeply unpleasant town councillor. Leonard is smug, manipulative and determined to make life difficult for Sarah while presenting himself as a respectable public servant. He is both the principal antagonist and a rich comic role for an actor who can balance menace, self-importance and absurdity.

PAULINE (65+)

A resident of Beach Haven. Creative, flamboyant, elegant and gloriously pompous, Pauline considers herself a true artiste. In reality, she is a retired boarding-school art teacher with a tendency towards delusions of grandeur. A bold comic role requiring confidence, flair and excellent timing.

IVY (65+)

A resident of Beach Haven. Quick-witted, sarcastic, feisty and fiercely protective of those she loves. Ivy was a single mother long before it was socially accepted and worked a variety of jobs to support her family. Beneath her sharp tongue is enormous loyalty and warmth.

ANGELA (65+)

A resident of Beach Haven. Sharp-minded, business-savvy and highly practical. Angela worked as secretary and accountant to her unfaithful former husband and has learned to rely on her own intelligence. Sensibly dressed and good with numbers, she is often the most grounded member of the group.

ROSE (65+)

A gentle, kind-hearted resident of Beach Haven. Rose has lost both her husband and her son, while her daughter rarely has time for her. She sometimes becomes confused and may be showing the early signs of dementia, but her warmth, innocence and compassion make her the emotional heart of the story.

GLEN / TIM (MID-20s–30s / EARLY 20s)

This may be played as a doubled role.

Glen is a grubby, opportunistic reporter for the local newspaper who is always looking for a sensational angle.

Tim is Kirsty’s boyfriend, a sweet-natured and slightly nerdy web designer whose unexpected idea helps launch the ladies’ new business.

CARLA / PIP / KIRSTY (APPROX. 25–40)

These roles may be divided or played by one performer.

Carla is an exuberant and relentlessly enthusiastic fitness instructor.

Pip is a brisk, capable and professional television producer who knows exactly how to run a production.

Kirsty is Ivy’s loving granddaughter. Energetic, supportive and tech-savvy, she helps transform the residents into the “Call Girls”.

FATHER O’DOWD / JACK / MAYOR LYLE CLARKE (60s+)

These supporting roles may be divided or played as cameos by one performer.

Father O’Dowd is a traditional Irish priest with a fondness for sermons, sherry and charitable causes.

Jack is a recently widowed man who is lonely, vulnerable and nervous about beginning again.

Mayor Lyle Clarke is larger than life, confident and a close friend of television celebrity Phillip Dinkle.

PHILLIP DINKLE (AGE FLEXIBLE)

An eccentric and highly entertaining television personality. Phillip is the suave, flamboyant presenter of Hidden Gems, a programme similar to Antiques Roadshow. He is charming, debonair, self-important and every inch the celebrity. A standout cameo requiring charisma and bold comic instincts.